If you asked me when I was 22, 25, or hell even 27 where I would be when I was 32 I would have told you that I would be married with children, without a moment’s hesitation, without a second thought. I was supposed to be that woman, the one who graduated college, started climbing that corporate ladder, got married, bought a house, had the obligatory 2 children, and cut my hair into chic, but still “I’m a mom” bob. It could have happened that way. It happens that way all the time. But not for me; I never knew I was going to wake up one morning when I was 28 and decide to change my life. To leave the man who was 14 years my senior, whom I lived with for most of my twenties, to say “fuck it” and start over. To find the person I really am. To learn to stand on my own two feet. To look in the mirror and know the person staring back at me again.
What they don’t tell you when you pull the plug on your cookie cutter life is: you’re going to have to learn how to date; and that means “adult dating”, not bumping into a dashing stranger at the Fraternity party while you’re both in line for the keg. Dating, as in online dating, coffee dates ( sorry, that’s lame; buy me a drink at least), D pics (filtered on an occasion), tinder matches, dating men with children, plan B, early morning meetings when you were just racing across town to throw a brush in your hair and change your clothes from the night before.
They don’t tell you that you have to learn how to live alone. To appreciate the silence, to know what to do with a TV remote, to cook for one, to sleep in a bed all to yourself, that you have to change the batteries in smoke detectors. They don’t tell you that you’ll learn to like it; you’ll crave your space and the fear you’ll have that you may have to share it again one day.
This is my story, my heartbreaks and my highlights. Maybe you can relate to my story, I’d like to think I’m not the only girl living this life. Perhaps you can’t, but either way, I hope you enjoy the read!